$Id: snippets.txt 562 2011-03-11 20:34:35Z empii $ ------------- Jämi 15 km: 2012: 14./19 Mikko Pekkarinen 1.44.02 +24.54 2010: 24./38 Mikko Pekkarinen 1.59.20 +28.20 2009: 14./29 Pekkarinen Mikko 1.55.13 +27.50 ------------- penisland.com expertsexchange.com ferrethandjobs.com powergenitalia.com molestationnursery.com whoreviews.com whorepresents.com therapistfinder.com gotahoe.com childrenslaughterhouse.com RIM.jobs speedofart.com bigbustycoons.com cummingfirst.com ipanywhere.com ------------- Menot (tiliotteista) 2011 2010 2009 2008 €/kk 1302,78 1300,65 1118,67 1244,99 (- * 706,17 869,41 758,19 812,34) €/d 42,83 42,76 36,78 40,93 (- * 23,22 28,58 24,93 26,71) Kuu ∑ 2011 ∑ 2010 ∑ 2009 ∑ 2008 1 650,74 944,22 958,23 1307,12 2 875,17 725,66 2112,90 1564,36 3 4022,28 1463,62 1068,89 1149,47 4 1341,66 871,17 1014,72 2546,06 5 1150,43 969,01 797,15 793,86 6 1185,37 2039,37 809,39 645,47 7 1276,86 1812,82 1425,32 1291,20 8 1029,32 1059,23 1033,76 581,13 9 926,44 2334,82 871,60 877,13 10 1188,30 1064,30 827,94 2084,25 11 695,70 1027,97 1443,74 1150,94 12 1291,12 1295,65 1060,34 948,87 ∑ 15633,4 15607,8 13424,0 14939,9 ∑ 2011 ∑ 2010 ∑ 2009 ∑ 2008 Kategoria 376,55 474,54 375,51 684,59 Netti + känny 20,60 19,10 - - Gopal (korttimaksu)* 191,54 - - 290,34 Hammaslääkäri (KELA palauttaa ropoja) 4890,00 2855,00 1376,25 2280,48 Lahjukset* 294,00 144,50 274,00 225,60 Lehdet* 169,86 240,36 640,94 1495,22 Matkailu (bensa, hotelli)* 274,62 543,85 991,50 77,50 Matkaliput 292,86 737,34 905,73 1682,06 Ostokset kortilla 4940,00 5160,00 4810,00 4360,00 Käteisnostot 40,75 32,50 40,05 90,68 Pankkimaksut 172,29 225,14 111,39 74,98 Sähkö 45,00 200,00 88,00 - Sampola/Ahjola* 25,00 20,00 20,00 20,00 Sarjakuvaseura* 1631,04 1631,55 1557,77 622,45 Siivous (verottaja palauttaa (x-100)*0,6 €)* 83,90 64,00 368,80 257,70 Sport* 128,49 108,66 84,74 90,44 Vakuutus 2056,98 1905,90 1779,30 1706,00 Vastike 2008 muut: 290,35 Korttiostot kirjakaupasta* 200,44 Asuntolainan korot 46,00 passi 269,00 Pyörät 159,00 Tietokoneen osat 17,03 TV-lupa (2007 GEZ) ------------- Hiilijalanjälki 2011-04-17 (ilmastodieetti.fi) Asuminen 3397 Jätteet 41 liikenne 649 Ruoka 1144 Kulutus 1163 Yht. 6394 kg ------------- 1594 G. Chapman Σκíα Νυκτóς sig. Aij, It is an exceeding rapture of delight in the deepe search of knowledge‥that maketh men manfully indure th'extremes incident to that Herculean labour. ------------- Jos unohtaa hetkeksi sen miltä tuntuu, voi huomata että usein oikeasti tietää mikä on vialla ja myös sen mikä on vastaus, oikea toimintatapa. Tämän jälkeen ongelma on uskalluksessa. Tai tarkemmin: sen puutteessa. (Christer Nuutinen, Kolmas muusa) ------------- SAP = "Sanduhr-Anzeige-Programm". ------------- Gentoo Linux, a distribution designed for users possessing that delicate combination of insecurity and masochism that results in an obsession with obscurity, optimization, and huge dollops of pain and frustration. Gentoo has sated all of these urges. It is also speculated that Gentoo was developed by GNU as a way to test new features of the upcoming version of their C compiler by forcing normal users to use it. (They ultimately failed at this, as nobody who uses Gentoo is normal.) (http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Gentoo) ------------- "Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from a rigged demo" ------------- Caesar et iam forti, Brutus et erat. Caesar sic in omnibus, Brutus sic inat. "O, Sibile! Si ergo. / Fortibus es in ero. / O nobile! Demis trux. / Vatis enim? Causant dux." ------------- "Anticipatory plagiarism occurs when someone steals your original idea and publishes it a hundred years before you were born" ------------- Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself: "Mankind". Basically, it's made up of two separate words- "mank" and "ind". What do these words mean? It's a mystery, and that's why so is mankind. (Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey) ------------- Hiilijalanjälki 2010-10-25 (hiilijalanjalki.hs.fi): Asuminen 1543 kg (keskim. 1555) Liikenne 62 kg (3624) Ruokailu 2056 kg (1574) Elämäntapa 1518 kg (1243) Yht. 5179 kg, "Kestävän kehityksen guru" ------------- One of the neat examples of this is the story of how Major MacMahon discovered the rough growth of the partition function. Recall {p(n)} is the number of ways of writing {n} as a sum, if we do not count order. Thus {p(4)} is {5}: \displaystyle \begin{array}{rcl} 4 &=& 1 + 1 + 1 + 1 \\ 4 &=& 1 + 1 + 2 \\ 4 &=& 1 + 3 \\ 4 &=& 2 + 2 \\ 4 &=& 4. \end{array} Apparently he kept lists of the number of partitions of numbers and eventually noticed that the number of decimal digits in the numbers formed a parabola. This suggested that \displaystyle p(n) \approx e^{c \sqrt n}. He was right: although the correct approximate formula is a bit more complicated. \displaystyle \frac{\exp \left(\pi \sqrt{2n/3} \right)}{4n\sqrt 3}. (http://rjlipton.wordpress.com/2010/09/12/how-to-present-a-big-result/) --------------- Paczesiowa 10 points 8 hours ago[-] perl < /dev/urandom that's a great game, I once made it to the third level (it broke on third line). (reddit, 2010-08-07) ------------- """I knew I could never work in that context again, because the worst thing you can do to a skilled person, is force them to work in a context where their own personal output is well bellow what their skill is capable of.""" ------------- "Programmers who code in glass houses should wear pants." ------------- Bussi Tre - Mtä 06:05 07:30 6 1h 25min pika Tampere - Jyväsk M-L toistaiseksi 06:55 08:50 6 1h 55min vakio Tampere - Mänttä M-P,+ 10.08.09 - 06.06.10 10:10 12:10 4 2h 0min vakio Tampere - Mänttä M-P,+ 10.08.09 - 06.06.10 13:15 15:05 4 1h 50min vakio Tampere - Mänttä M-P 06.06.10 asti 13:15 15:05 4 1h 50min vakio 95 Tre - Mänttä L toistaiseksi 15:00 16:25 6 1h 25min pika Tampere - Jyväsk M-S toistaiseksi 16:15 17:45 6 1h 30min pika Tampere - Keuruu M-P toistaiseksi 17:25 18:45 6 1h 20min pika Tampere - Keuruu SS toistaiseksi 18:00 19:55 6 1h 55min vakio Tampere - Mänttä M-P,++ 09.08.09 asti 18:05 19:50 6 1h 45min vakio Tampere - Mänttä M-P,+ 10.08.09 - 06.06.10 19:15 20:30 6 1h 15min pika Tampere - Jyväsk SS toistaiseksi 21:50 23:15 6 1h 25min vakio Tampere - Keuruu SS toistaiseksi Bussi Mtä - Tre 05:55 07:40 1h 45min vakio Vilppula - Tre M-P toistaiseksi 07:50 09:45 1h 55min vakio Mänttä - Orivesi M-P,+ 10.08.09 - 06.06.10 Vaihto: Orivesi (9:00-9:05) pika Jyväskylä - Turku M-L toistaiseksi 08:45 10:40 1h 55min vakio 95 Mänttä - Tre L toistaiseksi 08:55 10:35 1h 40min vakio Mänttä - Tampere M-P,+ 10.08.09 - 06.06.10 09:30 10:55 1h 25min pika Jyväskylä - Tre M-L toistaiseksi 12:00 13:30 1h 30min pika Keuruu - Tampere M-P toistaiseksi 12:35 13:55 1h 20min pika Keuruu - Tampere S toistaiseksi 13:10 14:30 1h 20min pika Karstula - Tampere P toistaiseksi 14:00 15:50 1h 50min vakio Mänttä - Orivesi M-P,+ 10.08.09 - 06.06.10 Vaihto: Orivesi (15:00-15:05) pika Jyväskylä - Turku M-S toistaiseksi 15:10 17:05 1h 55min vakio Mtä - Oriv -Tre M-P toistaiseksi 15:30 17:00 1h 30min pika Keuruu - Tampere SS toistaiseksi 16:20 18:35 2h 15min vakio Mänttä - Orivesi M-P,+ 10.08.09 - 06.06.10 Vaihto: Orivesi (17:20-17:35) vakio Jyväskylä - Tre M-P,+ 10.08.09 - 06.06.10 17:00 18:30 1h 30min pika Jyväskylä - Tre M-To,SS toistaiseksi 17:35 18:55 1h 20min pika Jyväskylä - Tre P toistaiseksi 18:00 19:55 1h 55min vakio Mänttä - Tampere SS toistaiseksi 19:05 20:25 1h 20min pika Karstula - Tampere SS toistaiseksi + = kouluvuoden aikana ++ = kesälomalla Junat Vilppulaan 22.10.2009 asti 10:05 11:05 1h H 423 Haapamäki M-S 16:15 17:15 1h H 427 Haapamäki M-S 20:15 21:15 1h H 429 Vilppula M-P,S Junat Vilppulasta 12.12.2009 asti: 6.42 7.42 2 1h H 420 Tampere M-L 12.42 13.42 2 1h H 424 Tampere M-S 18.42 19.42 2 1h H 428 Tampere M-S ------------- If GML was an infant, SGML is the bright youngster far exceeds expectations and made its parents too proud, but XML is the drug-addicted gang member who had committed his first murder before he had sex, which was rape. (Erik Naggum, http://harmful.cat-v.org/software/xml/s-exp_vs_XML) ------------- The Web site you seek Cannot be located, but Countless more exist. Chaos reigns within. Reflect, repent, and reboot. Order shall return. Program aborting: Close all that you have worked on. You ask far too much. Windows NT crashed. I am the Blue Screen of Death. No one hears your screams. Yesterday it worked. Today it is not working. Windows is like that. Your file was so big. It might be very useful. But now it is gone. Stay the patient course. Of little worth is your ire. The network is down. A crash reduces Your expensive computer To a simple stone. Three things are certain: Death, taxes and lost data. Guess which has occurred. You step in the stream, But the water has moved on. This page is not here. Out of memory. We wish to hold the whole sky, But we never will. Having been erased, The document you're seeking Must now be retyped. Serious error. All shortcuts have disappeared. Screen. Mind. Both are blank. (http://www.authorware.com/humtext.asp?Hum_ID=105) ------------- Jollet vaihda suuntaa, voit päätyä sinne, minne olet menossa. Laotse (vai Matti Nykänen?) ------------- Side effects include: Headache, runny nose, drowsiness, and a rash A sugar high, bloating, and an absence of cash Vomiting, abdominal cramps, and diarrhea And an overwhelming urge to buy a couch from IKEA Acute kidney failure and acidic blood A massive build up of that eyeball crud Melted genitals, eyesight like a bug Death, and reincarnation as a slug ------------- "Kananmuna edustaa mitä puhtainta muotoilua, vaikka se on peräisin suoraan kanan – sanonko mistä." (Bruno Munari) Leikkivä lapsi on terve, etenkin jos hän on aikuinen. "Upseerina ja herrasmiehenä en halua loukata sinua. Totean vain että olet ruma ja laiska." (Mannerheim (ja ihmissyöjätiikeri)) ------------- Jos teillä ei ole taloa, tulipalo ei sitä varmasti uhkaa. Vaimokaan ei lähde toisen matkaan, jos ei ole vaimoa. Jos teillä ei ole koiraa, naapurit eivät voi sitä myrkyttää. Ystävän kanssa ei tule riitaa, jos ei ole ystävää. Ja jos ei elä, ei myöskään ole tarvetta kuolla! Siksi miettikää, harkitkaa ja päättäkää, että onko teillä vai ei! (HS, 4. tai 11.1.2009) ------------- [b100dian 7 points 19 hours ago[-]] Whats this java again? [grauenwolf 73 points 19 hours ago[-]] It's the program that puts the Coffee cup icon on your system tray. If I recall correctly, that icon means "You computer is about to become really, really slow. You might as well go get a cup of coffee while it reboots." ------------- 2 blank tiles (scoring 0 points) 1 point: A ×10, I ×10, N ×9, S ×7, T ×9, E ×8 2 points: K ×5, L ×5, O ×5, Ä ×5 3 points: U ×4, M ×3 4 points: H ×2, J ×2, P ×2, R ×2, V ×2, Y ×2 7 points: D ×1, Ö ×1 8 points: B ×1, F ×1, G ×1 10 points: C ×1 (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scrabble_letter_distributions#Finnish) ------------- 2008 2006? Introverted 89% 100% Sensing 12% 12% Thinking 88% 75% Judging 22% 22% You are: - very expressed introvert - slightly expressed sensing personality - very/distinctively expressed thinking personality - slightly expressed judging personality (http://typelogic.com/istj.html) ------------- CO_2-jalanjälki: 5475 kg/v - ruoka 21% (1032 kg) - liikenne 8% (475 kg) - asuminen 22% (1236 kg) - kulutus 41% (2291 kg) - jätteet 8% (441 kg) ------------- private drool Rachelle(string tanga) { DecorateInterior(); InviteVisitor(); ObtainThreadHandle(); UnwrapObject(); TouchStructure(); Unzip(); InsertStub(); Push(); InjectChildData(); Pull(); Sleep(8 * 3600); } (TDWTF) ------------- 1. The human cell contains 75 MB of genetic information 2. A sperm 37.5 MB. 3. In a milliliter, we have 100 million sperms. On average, one ejaculation releases 2.25 ml in 5 seconds. Using basic math we can compute the bandwidth of the human male penis as: (37.5MB x 100M x 2.25)/5 = (37,500,000 bytes/sperm x 100,000,000 sperm/ml x 2.25 ml) / 5 seconds = 1,687,500,000,000,000 bytes/sec = 1,687.5 TerraBytes/sec Sweet DoS attack!!! a bukkake would probably be a DDoS then 11 men would give 17 petabytes/sec ------------- Sprague-Grundy theory is a complete theory of all finite impartial games, which are games like this one where the two players have exactly the same moves from every position. The theory says: - Every such game position has a "value", which is a non-negative integer. - A position is a second-player win if and only if its value is zero. - The value of a position can be calculated from the values of the positions to which the players can move, in a simple way. - The value of a collection of disjoint positions (such as two disconnected rows of dots) can be calculated from the values of its component positions in a simple way. Long details follow. They are also found in "Winning Ways", Vol I, by Berlekamp, Conway, and Guy. (http://blog.plover.com/math/sprague-grundy.html) ------------- The First Poem Written for Computers <>!*''# ^"`$$- !*=@$_ %*<>~4 &[]../ |{,,SYSTEM HALTED For you somewhat cybernetically challenged, it goes something like this (using the proper cyber-names): Waka waka bang splat tick tick hash, Caret quote back-tick dollar dollar dash, Bang splat equal at dollar under-score, Percent splat waka waka tilde number four, Ampersand bracket bracket dot dot slash, Vertical-bar curly-bracket comma comma CRASH (http://www.cise.ufl.edu/~ddd/poem.htm) ------------- Anyway, I did not mean to get into this in so much detail. The reason I brought this up is that because of my continuing interest in Jaynes' theory, and how it is viewed by later scholars, I am reading Muses, Madmen, and Prophets: Rethinking the History, Science, and Meaning of Auditory Hallucination by Daniel B. Smith. I am not very far into it yet, but Smith has many interesting things to say about auditory hallucinations, their relationship to obsessive-compulsive disorder, and other matters. On page 37 Smith mentions a paper, which as he says, has a wonderful title: "Involuntary Masturbation as a Manifestation of Stroke-Related Alien Hand Syndrome". Isn't that just awesome? It gets you coming and going, like a one-two punch. First there's the involuntary masturbation, and while you're still reeling from that it follows up with "alien hand syndrome". ------------- Tuoteideoita Kuulokoje ikäntyvälle muusikolle: säädettävä taajuusvaste niin että korkeita ääniä voi vahvistaa tarpeen mukaan. (Idea elokuvasta "Si sos brujo", jossa Emilio Balcarce manaa heikentyvää kuuloaan.) USB-peili: kenkään/varteen kiinnitettävä peili josta näkee lukea mitä lattialla olevassa PC:ssä kiinniolevassa USB-tikussa lukee (kun se tarra on kumminkin aina sen tikun alasivulla). Solmio-taskuliina yhdistelmä: Solmio, jonka kärki on valkoinen. Puvun rintataskun takana viilto, josta solmion pää tuodaan taskuun siten että kärki tulee näkyviin. Integroitu lippu-lipputankoyhdistelmä. Lippu on rullalla tangon sisällä, ja kauko-ohjattava sähkömoottori kelaa sen piiloon/esiin. Ajastin tuntee liputussäännöt ja -päivät ja liputtaa automaattisesti säädösten mukaisesti. (Keksitty 11.5.2008 ylen uutisen perusteella. Hesarissa käytännössä sama idea noin 29.5.) Puunkaatopussi. Kun puita on kaadettu ja karsittu risujen siivoamisessa on kauheasti hommaa. Ennen kaatamista puun yli vedetään pussi jossa on n. metrin välein kiristysliinat. Kun puu kaatuu, kaikki oksat pysyvät pussissa. Kiristetään liinoilla oksasto kompaktiksi paketiksi. Pätkitään liinojen välistä, ja kannetaan rungon pätkät oksineen pinoon siistissä paketissa. ------------- PDQ Bach, "Es War Ein Dark Und Shtormy Night". ------------- Tätä tietoa en läytänyt googlella suomeksi. Kierrätyskoodi? Kierrätyssymboli? Kierrätyskolmio? Nuolikolmio? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/International_Universal_Recycling_Codes ------------- Wenn ist das Nunstück git und Slotermeyer? Ja! ... Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput. ------------- En tajuta tanhua voi tähtitarhain, ja epäily on tutkimusten tulos -- parhain. Alati etsin tietoa, mut -- ah! -- en mitään tiedä nyt jälkeen kaiken, vaikk'en kuollut varhain. pre-FAT: Nyt säästä mua tuskalt' ankealta, nyt pahat työni peitä maailmalta: oi, tänään onnellinen anna minun olla! Lyö huomenna -- nyt mieltäs, Herra, malta! (Omar Khaijam, Teltantekijä) ------------- Syntynyt 11.5. Paroni von Münchhausen 1720, Dali 1904, Feynmann 1918, Dijkstra 1930, Janne Ahonen 1977 Kuollut 11.5. Alvar Aalto 1976, Bob Marley 1981, Douglas Adams 2001 ------------- Suomi vs. Saksa: AltGr+q ei anna @-merkkiä. Mutta y ja z ovat oikeilla paikoillaan näppiksessä. kaupassa on kallista kassalla laarit => ei niin hektistä pakkaamista puolivalmisteita ja eineksiä aina myös ostoskoreja, ei pelkkiä kärryjä kaffilassa ei tarvitse odotella laskua kun kaikki maksetaan jo tullessa päivä on lyhyt ja pimeä ja kurainen (suojasäällä) ulko- ja katuvalaistusta on n kertaa enemmän liikennemerkit on hassun värisiä (keltapohjaisia) ------------- Lakisääteiset vapaapäivät: uusi vuosi 1.1. vappu 1.5. juhannusaatto (20.6.2008) itsenäisyyspäivä 6.12. jouluaatto 24.12. arkipyhät: loppiainen 6.1. pitkäperjantai 21.3. 2. pääsiäispäivä 24.3. helatorstai 1.5. joulupäivä 25.12. tapani 26.12. ------------- Yeah, a better description for Java is "write once, run away." ------------- "ratio tile, the wish power are together with you" ------------- Sun on helmet sun on villas Talon join Ah, sure Hamlet. Miss lie into sun? Miss on ties? Maiden pimento tie. Vale helmet vain sullen vein. (Pekka Lounela: Rautainen nuoruus. Tammi 1976) ------------- Atheist, n. God's way of mocking the faithful. -being, n. suffix A combining form for creating terms that mean "agent": spokesbeing, gentlebeing, chairbeing. It avoids the anthropocentrism of -person. Bonobo, n. Pan paniscus, a forest-dwelling primate of central Africa. The bonobo shares 98% of its genes with its closest relatives, the chimpanzee (Pan troglodytes, Latin for "cave-dwelling ape"), and the human (Homo sapiens sapiens, "the ape that thinks it thinks"). Unlike the chimpanzee and the human, the bonobo does not engage in warfare, power politics, murder, or cannibalism. The bonobo species resolves conflict through sex rather than aggression -- bonobos would rather fuck than fight. (See "Bonobo Sex and Society" by Frans B. M. de Waal, Scientific American, March 1995.) ------------- Manuel Uribe Foundation ------------- The technique used here is called Verlet integration (see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Verlet_integration for more details.) One of the main advantages of this technique over for instance Euler integration is that it is [quite] stable. Complex physics simulation using Euler integration is more prone to 'explode' unless tuned carefully (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Euler_integration.) The main reason for this is that the speed of the point mass is implicitly defined by its current and previous position rather than a velocity variable. ------------- Roses are #FF0000. Violets are #0000FF. ------------- 18 84 58 A6 D1 50 34 DF E3 86 F2 3B 61 D4 37 74 45 5F E1 04 22 CA 29 C4 93 3F 95 05 2B 79 2A B2 09 F9 11 02 9D 74 E3 5B D8 41 56 C5 63 56 88 C0 ------------- Moskau Fremd und geheimnisvoll Enter the hymen store Türme aus rotem Gold Two men are scorched and burned Kalt wie das Eis Kite me a sign Moskau Doch wer dich wirklich kennt Don't worry Bill is dead Der weiß, ein Feuer brennt There lies the toy opened In dir so heiß Indians are high Kosaken hey hey hey hebt die Gläser They're sucking dick, hey, they let you play son Natascha ha ha ha du bist schön If they show up, up time to be served Towarisch hey hey hey auf das Leben Somebody hey hey look at this ladel Auf Dein Wohl Bruder hey Bruder ho 'cause I'm going through the hay to your home Moskau, Moskau Wirf die Gläser an die Wand Billy is a handyman Russland ist ein schönes Land Porcelain is the surest plan Ho ho ho ho ho, hey Moskau, Moskau Deine Seele ist so groß Dinah Steeler is too loose Nachts da ist der Teufel los Castro it's the time to lose Ha ha ha ha ha, hey Moskau, Moskau Liebe schmeckt wie Kaviar Please respect the caviar Mädchen sind zum küssen da Rangers end up pissed in tar Ho ho ho ho ho, hey Moskau, Moskau Komm wir tanzen auf dem Tisch Come and dance and love the fish Bis der Tisch zusammenbricht Mister Disco summoned it Ha ha ha ha ha Moskau Tor zur Vergangenheit Spiegel der Zarenzeit Rot wie das Blut Moskau Wer deine Seele kennt Der weiß, die Liebe brennt Heiß wie die Glut Kosaken hey hey hey hebt die Gläser Natascha ha ha ha du bist schön Towarisch hey hey hey auf die Liebe Auf Dein Wohl Mädchen hey Mädchen ho Moskau, Moskau Wirf die Gläser an die Wand Russland ist ein schönes Land Ho ho ho ho ho, hey Moskau, Moskau Deine Seele ist so groß Nachts da ist der Teufel los Ha ha ha ha ha, hey Moskau Lala lala lala la, lala lala lala la Ho ho ho ho ho, hey Moskau, Moskau Lala lala lala la, lala lala lala la Ha ha ha ha ha Oh, oh oh oh oh, oh oh oh oh, oh oh oh Moskau, Moskau Moskau, Moskau Wodka trinkt man pur und kalt Don't you think I'm cool in tights Das macht hundert Jahre alt 'cause it's made of yarn and hide ha ha ha ha ha, hey Moskau, Moskau Väterchen dein Glas ist leer Page is in the Naga's lair Doch im Keller ist noch mehr Dokken yells out "it's not fair" Ha ha ha ha ha Moskau, Moskau Liebe schmeckt wie Kaviar Mädchen sind zum küssen da Ha ha ha ha ha Moskau, Moskau Komm wir tanzen auf dem Tisch Bis der Tisch zusammenbricht Ha ha ha ha ha, hey! ------------- "It's real. It's a joke nerd product that teaches English entirely through lines from Full Metal Jacket" ------------- I have reviewed dozens of JavaScript books, and I can only recommend one: JavaScript: The Definitive Guide (5th Edition) by David Flanagan. ------------- "He died as he'd lived: painlessly and asleep." ------------- /************************************************************* * * * .=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-. * * | ______ | * * | .-" "-. | * * | / \ | * * | _ | | _ | * * | ( \ |, .-. .-. ,| / ) | * * | > "=._ | )(__/ \__)( | _.=" < | * * | (_/"=._"=._ |/ /\ \| _.="_.="\_) | * * | "=._"(_ ^^ _)"_.=" | * * | "=\__|IIIIII|__/=" | * * | _.="| \IIIIII/ |"=._ | * * | _ _.="_.="\ /"=._"=._ _ | * * | ( \_.="_.=" `--------` "=._"=._/ ) | * * | > _.=" "=._ < | * * | (_/ \_) | * * | | * * '-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=' * * * * LASCIATE OGNI SPERANZA, VOI CH'ENTRATE * *************************************************************/ ------------- If she really loved you, she would have gotten you a Banach-Tarski coffee pot. You pour out half the coffee into a second pot, and you have two containers holding the same amount of coffee you started with. ------------- Another example: We know through Erdős that "a mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems". It thus follows by duality that a comathematician is a device for turning cotheorems into ffee. ------------- Chapter 2 of "Fundamental Algorithms" opens with "Hamlet's" first-act resolution "Yea, from the table of my memory I'll wipe away all trivial fond records." ------------- Die gsuchde Dadei isch nedd hir. Da mussch woanders gugge. ------------- I think there's some mystical relationship between the personality traits of "wakes up before dawn", "likes static typing but not type inference", "is organized to the point of being anal", "likes team meetings", and "likes Bad Agile". I'm not quite sure what it is, but I see it a lot. ------------- rebellious celt, but it's also called a rattleback or just a celt. ------------- All too often nowadays I see v., cf., and viz used as if they all meant "see". Traditionally, these have three distinct meanings. The only one that means "see" is v., an abbreviation for vide. cf. stands for confer "compare". It is appropriately used when you want to point the reader to a contrasting view or approach. viz is properly used to indicate that the following items constitute an exhaustive list. ------------- If Tyranny and Oppression come to this land, it will be in the guise of fighting a foreign enemy. -James Madison, fourth US president (1751-1836) ------------- If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? ------------- "I'm sorry this letter is so long. I didn't have time to write a shorter one." - Blaise Pascal (1657) ------------- Benjamin Franklin said it well: "Those who would forfeit essential liberty for temporary safety, deserve neither liberty or safety." ------------- Thomas Jefferson: "I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much liberty than to those attending too small a degree of it." ------------- Definition of a fanatic: Someone who redoubles his effort after forgetting his goal. ------------- Herein lies another possible pathway to depression. The ability to plan resides in the prefrontal cortex (PFC), the executive branch of the brain. The PFC is a critical part of the self-regulation system, and it's deeply implicated in depression, a disorder increasingly seen as caused or maintained by unregulated thought patterns—lack of intellectual rigor, if you will. Cognitive therapy owes its very effectiveness to the systematic application of critical thinking to emotional reactions. Further, it's in the setting of goals and progress in working toward them, however mundane they are, that positive feelings are generated. From such everyday activity, resistance to depression is born. ------------- http://www.myheritage.com: (/pictures/naama99.gif) Kirsten Dunst 64% Beyonce Knowles 62% Tarja Turunen 59% Ayumi Hamasaki 56% Priyanka Chopra 56% Brigitte Bardot 54% Rod Stewart 52% Ella Fitzgerald 50% Ludwig Feuerbach 49% Elisha Cuthbert 48% ------------- __o o__ _`\(,_ _,)/'_ ___________ (_)/ (_)___________(_) \(_)___ ------------- Ai! Laurije tantar lassi suhinen, jieni uunuottime pe raamar kaltaron! Jieni pe lintte jullar avaanier, mii oromarti lisse-mirupuoseva, Antuune pella Parto telkumar nu luini, jassen tinttilar i eleni Uomahjo kaire-taari liirinen. Sii man i julma nin enkkanttuva? An sii Tintalle Parto Ojolosseo, pe panjar maarjat Elenttaari orttane Ar ilje tier untulaape lumpule, ar tintanuoriello kaitta mornije I palmalinnar impe met, ar kiitie unttuuppa Kalakirjo miiri ojale. Sii vanua naa, Ruomello vanua, Palimar. Namaarije! Nai kiruvalje Palimar. Nai elje kiruva. Namaarije! ------------- After every flight, Quantas pilots fill out a form, called a gripe sheet, which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by Quantas pilots and the solutions recorded by maintenance engineers. By the way, Quantas is the only major airline that has never had an accident. P= The problem logged by the pilot. S= The solution and action taken by mechanics P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement. S: Almost replaced left inside tire. P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough. S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft. P: Something loose in cockpit S: Something tightened in cockpit. P: Dead bugs on windshield S: Live bugs on back order. P: Auto pilot in altitude hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent. S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground. P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear. S: Evidence removed P: DME volume unelievably loud S: DME volume set to more believable level P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick. S: Thats what they are there for. P: IFF inoperative S: IFF inoperative in OFF mode. P: Suspected crack in windshield. S: Suspect you're right. P: Number 3 engine missing S: Engine found on right wing after brief search. P: Aircraft handles funny. S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious. P: Target radar hums. S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics. P: Mouse in cockpit. S: Cat installed. P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. It sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer. S: Took hammer away from midget. ------------- 1. Pidä ilmastointiteipin palaa kuusi päivää syylän päällä. 2. Poista teippi ja liota syylää lämpimässä vedessä. 3. Hio syylää kevyesti, jotta se pienenee. 4. Laita uusi teipin pala 12 tunnin kuluessa. 5. Jatka hoitoa kaksi kuukautta, tai kunnes syylä on kadonnut. -------------